Monday, April 26, 2010

It hurts us!

Gollum, in many ways, represents how far the Orioles have fallen as an organization.

Gollum utters those words when Sam Wise tried to put a rope around his neck.

I uttered those words last night when MASN was showing the 1997 Divisional Playoff win against the Seattle Mariners.

It was the game when Davey Johnson removed all left-handed hitters from the O's line-up and replaced them with the likes of Jerome Walton and Jeff Reboulet because Randy Johnson was pitching. And it paid off -- the Orioles' right-handed line up beat Johnson twice en route to winning the series.

And even in the afterglow of a rare Orioles win, just their third in nineteen games, I couldn't bear to watch a game from the good old days when Mike Mussina was our ace and our bullpen could actually protect a lead. And seeing Davey Johnson in the dugout...Man, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

Watching that game was like looking at a picture of your wife from your wedding. She was so good looking back then. Nice hair, pretty face, big boobs and an ass shaped like an upside-down heart.

Now, she looks like someone from The People of Wal-Mart website. Going bald, busted grill, boobs down to her knees, and an ass the size of a Chevy Nova.

You'd think I would find comfort in the past during times like these, but I can't. It just hurts too much.

Every time I see Mussina in an Orioles uniform, I think of his ugly divorce from the O's and his second marriage. Every time I see Davey Johnson, I think of Johnson being to resign because Peter Angelos didn't like that Johnson donated the fine money paid by Roberto Alomar to one of Johnson's favorite charities. And every time I hear Jon Miller calling an O's game I can't help but remember how Angelos ran him out of town because he didn't bleed orange and black.

Don't get me wrong, I still love the Orioles -- Peter Angelos' warts and all.

But don't expect me to watch classic games when I had faith in the team to win every game, instead of expecting them to lose every single one, like I do now.

No comments: